My Early Birthday Present

We went to the military base and my dad surprised me by getting me my birthday present early. An 8GB Ipod Nano that I’ve been wanting for a long long long time. My old one disappeared and I was lost without it. I’m so glad I have a new one.

Goodbye

My grandmother and cousin left this morning around 7. I was sorta sad to see them leave, I really enjoyed having them at the house. In spite of the fact that I couldn’t smoke. I know that I was apprehensive at first before they came but I’m glad I got to see them. I’m also really glad that my dad is home for the week, we’ve been having fun. We went to church this morning around 9:30ish. There’s so many new people in the college ministry I don’t know. I really want to start reaching out and getting more involved with the church. In Sunday school we talked about the freedom to choose to live in sin or turn away from it. It really made me realize that lately my life has been nothing but ungodly. Me and Anthony had a purely sinful relationship and now that I realize that I also notice that it was mainly all based upon sex and my sexual feelings for him. It made me see that I want to start living the way God wants me to instead of by my own fleshly desires. Then the sermon in church backed up what I was thinking in Sunday school by showing me how much I longed for good Christian relationships. The preacher told us that it is our human desire to hunger for intimacy and relationships. I feel like that is the major thing in my life that I am lacking. The major thing that stood out to me though was the fact that we need to accept the moment for what it is and live in the now.

Welcome Home

My parents arrived home around 2 this afternoon . I was so excited to see my dad come through the door. I’ve missed him so much. After we picked up my sister from the church. We went to see The Chronicles of Narnia – Prince Caspian. It was such an amazing movie. Suspenseful and amazing just like the last one, It’s good to know that all sequels are not horrible. After the movie we went to eat at The Cheesecake Factory. I’m so full now, dinner was amazing and today was a wonderful day. My parents are so happy that I’m not with my ex anymore and I’m quickly recovering from the loss. He was a great guy, just not right for me.

Single Again

After four great months I’m single again. We both don’t want it to end but we both know it’s better that we end things. Anthony and I just broke up, because of his financial reasons. There’s just too much going on in his life and I cant just accept it anymore. We both want whats best in each others lives. Him being 32 and living on his own and unable to simply go back to his parents house. His job barely paying him enough or giving him enough hours to afford rent and child support. He made me feel so special, like I was something and someone.

Tomarrow

I’ve been exhausted and lazy all day, I got plenty of sleep but my body just feels drained and tired. Damn being a girl sucks! Yeahhh! My mom and dad come back from Washington D. C. tomorrow around 2. I’m so excited to see my dad I haven’t seen him since Christmas. My dad has been over in Afghanistan since June of 07. When he came home during Christmas I was in a bit of a funk. Now I wish I would have spent more time with him. Rather than with a stupid friend who only ended up stabbing me in the back. I plan on spending as much time as I can with him while he’s here on his trip this time. I’m really grateful that he has been safe over there and is getting to come home safely. I’m not normally the one to admit that I enjoy reading for fun but my middle sister is a huge book nerd. She handed me the first Stephenie Meyer book “Twilight” and I’ve been reading it for the last week or so. I have to admit its a pretty amazing book.

Field Days

My little sisters field day was yesterday. We had fun or at least the little kids did. My grandmother, cousin, and I just stood and sat around watching the kids play their different events. Then we went to get ice cream after school let out. My middle sister’s field day is today but I don’t think I want to go. My stomach is killing me.

It’s Not So Bad

New banner/layout, I really like it and I think it turned out good. I wish I could change the text and css colors but I’m broke. It’s raining like crazy. I have to admit I was stressing out the other day over nothing. It’s actually kinda nice to have my grandmother here. Although, we aren’t doing much besides sitting on the computers in the house. Which seems to be what I do every day. I don’t know why I was stressing out, and making a bigger deal out of this then it should be. Seems to be what I do with anything that seems challenging to me. I’m actually pretty proud of myself for not smoking since my mom’s left. Although I have definitely longed for one.

My Grandmother is coming!

I don’t know whether to be excited or scared, anxious, worried, so many mixed emotions when she’s coming. My mom is leaving tomorrow morning for Washington D.C. and my sisters and our grandmother is coming to stay and watch over us. Oh and my little cousin for a week. I feel like I’m preparing for the inferno although I know it won’t be that horrible. I mean she’s a great woman its just way too uptight for me when I’m around her. In fear of saying the wrong thing. I can’t cuss or smoke or anything for an entire week and no going out.  No seeing Anthony, please don’t let this be hell on earth. Please let the time pass by quickly. & please let me not go insaine. Lol ok I need to just keep telling myself that everything will be alright, it’ll be ok.

Sick?

I really hope not. I felt dizzy and my nose wouldn’t stop running yesterday. I don’t know if it’s stress because my grandmother is coming Sunday. It’s probably just the weather. I woke up this morning feeling somewhat better than I did yesterday but at the same time I’m still not feeling up to par. My mom went to help with my sister’s choir field trip at Sandy Lake, so I have the entire house to myself all day. I really hope I start feeling better I don’t want to be sick at all.

Craftster

This afternoon I ate lunch with my friend Ashley who I haven’t seen in forever. She’s such a great woman and has just graduated college to be a counselor. I’ve been searching for something fun and artsy to do all day and just cant decide on anything. Theres an amazing website called craftster.org and I’ve been adicted to it all day. I hope I can find some new crafts to do with the stuff that’s laying around my house. Of course that means that I need to clean my room and find all my craft supplies. Let the creativity flow.

I made these from Sculpey Polymer Clay.